For the past 35 years I have told one joke. One. It’s the only joke I can remember and it still gets a laugh if you’ve never heard it. Are you ready?

How do you top a car?

I’ll give you a moment to think...

You tep on the brake, tupid.

*cue cymbal*

My sister told a couple of groaners the other day like, “Have you heard about the actress who stabbed herself with her knife? That woman…Reese…”

To which everyone replied, “…Reese Witherspoon?”

And she said, “No, with her knife.”

*cymbal crashes to the floor*

So, look. It was kind of a tough week around here and I don’t just mean because we tell awful jokes. We could use a good guffaw. I’ll take your best one-liner, best riddle…whatever you have, but keep it fairly clean because this blog is read by a priest, a rabbi, and a minister…who walked into a bar. I’m here all night, folks! Don’t forget to tip your wait staff!

But, seriously. And, I don’t mean Siriously. I asked her to tell me a joke and look what she said.

everyone’s a comedian!

Clearly, I need your help folks. Hit me with your best shot in the comment section!

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