A few years ago, my son’s cardiologist told us that he would never be allowed to play contact sports. I had grown accustomed to imagining my boy as the next Tiger Woods (and me being a very rich Mommy), so I was surprised at his last heart check-up when the doctor cleared him to play soccer.

Now, let’s get something straight…I have one tough boy. This kid has had more needles in his veins in six years than most people have their whole lives. But, apparently the hospital is one thing and the soccer field is something else entirely.

At practice last night, after 50 minutes of drills, my kid hit a wall. The first time he complained was when he was playing defense in a scrimmage. He stopped in his tracks and yelled, “Mom! I’m tired.”

I yelled back from the sidelines, “You’re okay! You can hang in there for 10 more minutes!”

Then the second complaint, “Mom! My tummy hurts!”

Again I said, “Come on, buddy! You can do it! Just five more minutes!”

And, he was hanging in there just like I told him to…until, with just two minutes left in the practice, he took a hard-kicked ball right in the ear.

He burst into tears and ran off the field to me. I checked him out, then said, “I know you’re tired, but your ear looks okay. You can do this! When you’re playing on a team, you have to be there for your teammates. They need you. Now get back in there and show them what a big, strong, tough kid you are!”

When it didn’t appear that would convince him…I whispered something in his ear.

He then trotted back to the field for some inspirational words from the coach and one final huddle. They ended the practice by having the team put their hands together as they chanted, “One. Two. Three. TIGERS!”

Then my big, strong, tough boy ran off the field yelling what I thought would stay a secret, “Okay, Mom! Let’s go home so I can get my bubble bath!”

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My six year old son was playing Marble Blast on the computer when I thought it would be a good idea for him to stop his game and come read me a book. Because really? Who can get enough of Ten Apples Up on Top? The antics and drama always keep me coming back for more.

I called from the living room, “Hey, why don’t you come in here and read me a story?”

And it’s a good thing I knew he was playing a game, because he replied, “Okay, but wait until I die first!”

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A few months ago, my husband started a new job. His office isn’t particularly close to our house though. Because of that distance, and for various other reasons, I had never gone to visit his new digs with the kids. None of those reasons being that I was hoping to drop 20 pounds before meeting his new co-workers.

But, today he asked that we come up so I could hang some pictures for him and so he could introduce us to the people he hangs out with all day long.

I did my best to make the kids look presentable, I flat-ironed my hair, made up my face, and spent a half hour deciding what to wear. Though, that outfit turned out to NOT be good enough, so I stopped at a department store on the way to his office to buy a new shirt.

After we parked, I wiped off my son’s face and made sure my daughter’s hair wasn’t sticking out in all the wrong places.

But, I forgot to tell my son not to make comments about what people look like.

The first person we saw was the middle-aged receptionist, to whom my son quickly referred to as, “Grandma”.

And, the second person we met was a lovely lady whose face my son crept close to, then he looked her in the eye and said, “You have a little, little, little mole.”

I should’ve known that with my kid around, the least of my worries would be what I looked like.

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In an interview with Conde Nast Traveler, Matt Damon was quoted as saying, “I think many of our problems as a country would be solved if people had thick passports. There’s just no substitute for actually going and seeing things.”

Thanks Matt. We’ll get right on that.

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