Hey there, Melisa here.
I’m guest-posting for Momo because she is in the dark (literally) due to storms in her area, and the estimate for the restoration of electricity is currently July 7 or 8. (I wish I were joking.)
A little while ago, I was sitting in my living room when I heard my cell phone ringing downstairs. I didn’t run to get it, because I don’t know about you but Every Single Time I do that, it’s the blood center scheduling person wanting to know when I’m coming back in to donate (soon!), or some similarly annoying person.
I took my time going down to get the phone after it stopped ringing, and when I checked to see who it was, it was Momo. Figures. The girl NEVER CALLS ME. EVER. She’s so darn busy that I end up calling her and catching her just before she has a conference call or as she’s on her way out to a doctor’s appointment or…wait, should I be reading some signals here?
But I digress.
I called her back immediately because I knew she was without electricity, AND SHE DIDN’T ANSWER. (Don’t you hate that???)
I left her a message, and she still didn’t call back.
I called her again–and YES, I have friendly-stalker tendencies, thanks for asking–and she didn’t answer AGAIN. I admit I was a little worried.
I sent her a text:
Call me back! I’m here!
Nothing. So then, as I tend to do, I decided to become a thorn in her side. I sent a bunch of rapid-fire texts:
Hello? Did you butt-dial me?
You’re talking to Katie Couric, aren’t you?
Are you guys okay?
Do you have enough lemonade for Ali? I can send some! (Long story.)
I miss your things. (Another story for another day.)
Well, if you ever call me, try my house phone: better reception.
I hope you didn’t use the last bar on your phone to call me. Gah. I’m a terrible friend for not running to get my phone.
It’s just that, well, you NEVER CALL ME so it never occurred to me that it might be you.
And now I’m just texting all of this stuff because I’m hoping it will annoy you enough to call me back.
Of course, if your phone is dead, I guess you can’t.
Sigh.
Finally, after an eternity (or seven minutes), she called me back on my home phone. After she told me that I am the funniest person she has ever met (<-----slight exaggeration), she said, "Do you still have the log-in information for my blog, in case I die?" Yikes. I should have hung on to it the last time she gave it to me. I told her that I didn't, and did she need me to do something? "Yes! I need a post to go up! Would you want to write one for me? I can't post from my phone!" This was my moment. "SQUEEEEEEE!" I screamed. Wiping tears from my eyes (not really but I want to make Momo feel really good here), I said, "I'd be happy to!!" So there you have it, a guest post by me on why I'm guest posting. (Does this qualify as "Soooo meta"?) Fingers crossed that the power in Momo's neck of the woods is restored much sooner than they think. Just in case, I'm planning a great post for Tuesday about...aww, I'm not telling. You'll have to wait and see.
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TheNextMartha
Love the text messages. I can’t imagine going w/o power for that long. I’m sorry.
Melisa
I can’t either. Unfortunately Momo and her family have lots of experience with power outages. Yikes. 🙁
BEAN
I laughed out loud at “or seven minutes”.
Melisa
Thanks. Glad it wasn’t just me. 🙂
Momo Fali
In that seven minutes we were repacking the food and ice in my Mom’s coolers, because we’re living the Little House on the Prarie life. Only, with no Nellie. Thank goodness. I currently have five people, and a dog, in my living room floor. When everyone wakes up, we’re going to churn butter, which will promptly melt.
Thanks for stepping in, Melisa! Tu-tu!
Melisa
Trompe l’oeil!!
Gros bisous!
xoxo
Liz
Best guest post, ever! If this is really Melisa, I mean. Good one, Momo, just in case. Either way, we turned Amish for 5 days last summer. Hope your power comes back much much sooner!
Melisa
Oh, it was me alright. Didn’t you recognize my personal brand of crazy? 🙂
Colleen
Ha ha ha! You guys are hilarious! Poor poor Momo. How is it even POSSIBLE to be without power for a week?!? I mean, they could run extension cords to every home in less than a week!
Melisa
I told her that they need to just cut down all of the big trees in the area that are causing the problem… 🙂
Tara R.
You are a good friend… and funny, if not a little stalk-ish. In a good way of course.
Dang Momo! That’s a crazy long time to be without power. Hope it was just an estimate and you have electricity again soon.
Melisa
Thank you. As you know I’m totally harmless.
But I’d definitely rather read Momo’s posts here than mine… 🙂 Hope her power goes on tout de suite!
Joan (SurprisedMom)
Great post! Love the text messages! Thanks for the laughs! I hope Momo’s electricity goes on much, much sooner than predicted! Little House on the Prairie in the 21st century just isn’t fun!
Sylvia Joy
Sorry Momo, we lost our power for 3 and 1/2 hours last night so I didn’t get to read Mel’s helpful post. Thank goodness ours didn’t last long. At least we could have stayed at my husbands hotel if it did last any longer.
Love
Grandma W
Kristy
I’m new to the blog. I’m sorry MoMo is without power, but the silver lining is we, meaning I, now know how hysterical YOU are, Melissa! Loved the post! Can’t wait for Thursday 😉 However, I DO hope the electricity comes on before then!
Melisa
Thanks Kristy! Unfortunately this has made me realize that I am way funnier when I write on blogs that don’t belong to me, so I may try to become a permanent guest poster, or a “traveling” guest poster. I’ll keep you, uh, posted.:)
ascapecodturns
Bahaha, feel free to guest post for me. Maybe if I guest posted for you, I would be funnier? Maybe this could be a trend.
And crap, Momo, just get in the car and come stay with me for a week! The ocean is calling you!!!
Lisa
Best guest post ever!
Heather @Domestic Extraordinaire
I don’t really like playing Amish, we had to do it for a weekend when I forgot to pay the power bill and it was when we got back from vacation. Thankfully when most of our city lost power we were with power, I offered people to come to my house and sit in the AC, except I offered on Facebook. Next time I should think before I post and actually reach out to those without power with smoke signals or something that they could actually use.